“8 Things Happy Couples Do When They Feel Disconnected”
I’m always on the lookout for good information about relationships and this week I read a great article by Brittany Wong, “8 Things Happy Couples Do When They Feel Disconnected”.
If you’ve been reading my newsletter for a while, you know that I was a divorce attorney for 20 years. And now I’ve been doing Sedona Soul Adventures for 20 years, helping people stay together.
So when I saw the title, I checked it out and I completely agree with her. Because happy couples who want to stay happy, know they’ve got to do something if disconnection is setting in.
Here are what she says are the “8 Things Happy Couples Do When They Feel Disconnected,” plus my comments on her 8 points:
1. They address the disconnect quickly.
The sooner the better.
2. They also make it a “we” problem instead of a “you” problem.
Laying blame on the other person doesn’t work and it’s going to get you exactly what you don’t want – more disconnection.
3. When disconnection happens, secure couples are more likely to respond versus react.
Going into anger or upset doesn’t work. Lovingly reaching out to your partner can start the reconnection.
4. They make a plan to reconnect.
Smart couples know that if something is starting to go wrong, it’s just going to get worse unless you do something about it.
5. They recognize the problem may be unrelated to their relationship.
What I’ve found in over 40 years of working with couples, is that usually it isn’t the other person and it usually isn’t the relationship that’s causing the trouble. More often than not it’s the triggering of older, much deeper issues.
6. They handle their partner’s feelings sensitively and are quick to ask, “How can I help?”
Rather than being demanding or confrontational, they reach out with love.
7. They know the disconnect is only temporary.
In a good relationship, both people have a belief that if they try to reconnect and do something about it, they can probably come back into connection.
8. They follow through.
Secure couples know that if disconnection is happening, they need to 1) Do something about it and 2) Follow through on doing something about it.
As I read this article, I kept thinking “yes, that’s right,” “yes, that’s right,” and “that’s exactly why the answer to disconnection is doing a Couples Retreat.”
After 40 years of working with Couples (20 as a Divorce Attorney and now 20 years doing Sedona Soul Adventures), I know that all of these elements are so true. When a couple goes into disconnection, they can feel it and it feels really bad.
Humans are genetically wired for connection and when that disconnection sets in, it throws everything off. Suddenly, work isn’t as satisfying; fun things you used to do aren’t as enjoyable; your connection with other people (even your children) can suffer. If you don’t do something about it, it can affect every single area of your life, even your financial abundance and your health.
That’s why over half of the things to do she talks about in the article are about Doing Something – doing something as soon as possible and following through.
Doing nothing is where the danger lies.
Thinking that everything is just going to somehow magically “turn around” without you doing anything about it, puts you straight on the road to Splitsville. I’ve seen it over and over again. You start to drift, the disconnection sets in, and then suddenly one person is having an affair (and feeling justified) or it finally gets to the point where there just doesn’t seem like there are any good reasons to stay together.
And I especially love it in this article that she is saying that happy couples recognize the problem may be unrelated to their relationship.
After all these years of working with couples, we see it over and over again that what’s usually causing most of the trouble for people are old wounds, blocks, things that happened in childhood, and generational problems that most people don’t even realize are affecting them right now.
Our Practitioners are masters at discovering and releasing all this “gunk” and bringing people back into connection on all the levels – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual. And that’s how the reconnection happens.
Sandy says, “We went to see if we could save our marriage. We left with a much deeper understanding of each other a connection we hadn’t experienced in years.”
Oh my gosh, isn’t that so amazing? They came to see if they could save their marriage. They left with a much deeper understanding of each other and a connection they hadn’t felt in years. That’s the magic of what we do.
If you’re feeling disconnected from your partner, the most important thing is you need to do something about it, you need to do it sooner rather than later and you need to follow through.
Give us a call.
Did you know Sedona Soul Adventures was named
“Best of Sedona” for Retreats for 2020, 2021 & 2022 and
“Best Marriage Retreats in the US” 2017-2022?
And Bride’s Magazine named us one of the
“11 Best Couples Retreats Around the World” in 2022.
It’s because what we do gets results – call us now, let us help. As I always say, if you knew what could happen, you’d be calling right now.
Would you like to speak to someone today about doing a Soul Adventure? We’re even open on Sunday, because we’re here for you!
Remember, there’s no cost or obligation and you can
do it in-Sedona or At Home.
Call us at (928) 204-5988 or request a call from one of our
Soul Guides and they will call you.
Why group travel is so much better when you go to Egypt. Join us for Return to Egypt (March 9-22) plus our Jordan and Petra add on (March 4-9)
When I was in my 20’s I remember telling myself, “I will NEVER go in a group to travel anywhere.” I would see people traveling in groups with their tour leader carrying a flag or blowing a whistle, or worse, people having to wear name tags or beanies! “I will never travel like that”, I told myself.
Then I came to Egypt for the first time in 1983. This was before the internet and I did all the planning for the trip and the planning took forever. It was a fantastic trip, but one of the things that I kept seeing everywhere we went, was that groups were able to get into places that my boyfriend and I couldn’t get into on our own.
The first group trip I ever went on was a trip to Egypt in 1995. It was unbelievably fantastic. As now, Guardian Travel was our guide and there were things we were able to do because we were with Guardian Travel and because we were in a group…
Things like 2 hours of private time inside the Great Pyramid and being able to actually go down and be between the paws of the Sphinx (where the public isn’t allowed to go). We were able to do ceremony and meditations in these amazing places because it had been specially arranged for us.
I was drawn to go back to Egypt again in 2000, again with a group with Guardian Travel. I wasn’t the tour leader, I was just part of the group. That trip was even more amazing than the one in 1995. There was such a diverse group of people on that trip, including people who were so excited about the alternative explanations for things like the Great Pyramid.
I figured this was going to be my last trip to Egypt, so I bought a lot of stuff. The shopping was incredible and I told myself I would never be coming back here again!
Little did I know that my life would take such an interesting turn and that in 2002 I would found Sedona Soul Adventures and in 2004 I would start taking groups to Egypt each and every year.
What I have discovered in all these years and what the people who have gone with me on these trips have discovered is that going with other like-minded people to these amazing places adds such an incredible dimension to the trip. And because we’re part of a group and connected with Guardian Travel, we get to do things that the typical tourist doesn’t get to do.
And this year they’ve done it again! They’ve been able to make arrangements for us to have special private passes to the Tombs of King Tut, Seti I, and Queen Nefertari. These tombs are spectacular!
“The Egypt trip was truly phenomenal! I have never done traveling in a group before and I will honestly say that I did not think I would enjoy a ‘group’ trip as much as I did. It was most definitely my Journey of a Lifetime!!!”
~ Linda Kaczor
One of the things that is so fantastic about our trips is that typically our people fall in love with each other within 48 hours. So even if you’re traveling alone, you’re not traveling alone! You’ll have a bunch of friends with whom you’ll share these amazing experiences, many of whom will become friends for life.
“Sedona Soul Adventures trips are different. Such amazing people are drawn to these trips–it’s not like traveling with strangers, it’s like traveling with dear friends you haven’t seen in a long time. That is truly how I felt on both my Peru and Egypt trips.”
~ Elizabeth Stevens-Pande
If you’d like information on our trip (March 9 – March 22, 2023) check out our incredible Day to Day Itinerary (the Pyramids!, the Sphinx!, 5-day cruise down the Nile, Abu Simbel, Philae, Karnak, Luxor, and private time in the Great Pyramid just for our group).
On the Pricing, this is all-inclusive – airfare to and from New York (JFK) to Egypt, 4 flights within Egypt, 5 star hotels, 5-day, 5-star Nile Cruise, 3 meals each day, all transportation, admission to all the sites, our Egyptian guide (who reads hieroglyphics!), even tips for hotel and wait staff. Get all the information here.
If you have any questions about our trip, send me an email at [email protected].
Or feel free to give me a call at (928) 204-5988.
Or Click here and I’ll call you – I love talking about Egypt!
If you already know that you want to go, place your Risk Free Deposit* today.
And new this year! We’ve added a 5-day add-on trip to Jordan to see Petra, Jerash, Wadi Rum and the Dead Sea March 5-10! You may recognize Petra from the “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” movie. Get all the information here.
I hope to connect with you on this amazing journey!
Read testimonials from all the years we’ve gone to Egypt.
If you have any questions, email me at [email protected].
If you already know you want to go, place your deposit today for the Egypt trip.
Wishing you a week filled with the deepest connection!
*What is our Risk Free Deposit?
Your deposit is fully refundable up to September 1, 2022, no questions asked. Just let us know by email or phone.