It Looked Like They'd Stopped Loving Each Other
(Article Based in Part on Chapter 5 of Our New Book!)
Oliver and Emma walked into their retreat with their arms stiffly at their sides, not touching, not even looking at each other. They weren't there to reignite anything. They were there because Emma had already said the words out loud: “If something doesn't change, I want a divorce.”
For months their home had been filled with a simmering silence, broken only by sharp remarks.
“You don't even see me.”
“You never appreciate what I do.”
“Why do I bother trying?"
They hadn't had sex in over two years, not since Oliver started his new business, and lately he had begun spending late nights on a couch at his office simply to avoid the unpleasantness at home.
But the distance wasn't only between the two of them, and this is the part most couples don't see until someone says it out loud. Their teenage daughter had started staying out late to avoid the tension in the house. Their younger son had begun wetting the bed again. The whole family was suffering.
At first glance it looked like the problem was that they weren't having sex, along with the usual fighting about chores and money and schedules. In their private sessions, the deeper fault lines appeared.
What was actually running the show.
Oliver's Core Wound was I am not valued. Every time Emma criticized him or overlooked him it didn't simply sting in the present, it echoed a lifetime of feeling dismissed by a father who only noticed him when something had gone wrong. The unspoken message had burrowed deep, and it said that you don't matter unless you perform constantly and perfectly.
Emma's wound was a different one, and hers said I am not enough. She had been raised in a family where love was conditional on achievement, so she learned to push herself relentlessly, and no matter how much she accomplished it never once felt sufficient. When Oliver withdrew from her or avoided her, she didn't merely feel alone. She felt fundamentally inadequate.
Neither of them had walked into that retreat knowing these Core Wounds by name.
But once they were discovered, the real work could begin: dissolving the charge that kept them stuck.
During their Sedona Formula sessions, Oliver felt the heavy armor around his chest begin to melt, as though the old story of being unvalued was finally loosening its grip. Emma described a knot in her stomach gently uncoiling, a tension she had been carrying for years. It was as though the weight of not being enough had at last lifted, unhooking itself from her body and dissolving into light.
When they came back together in their couples session, their eyes met for the first time in days without flinching.
Oliver whispered, “I feel lighter.”
And Emma answered him through tears: “For the first time, I believe we can find our way back.”
The invisible patterns driving their pain had been named and alchemized into self-love and understanding. For the first time in years, they weren’t two enemies locked in a standoff. They were two souls meeting in the rawness of truth and seeking a new beginning, so they could breathe high-vibe love into the relationship again.
This is exactly what we help couples do here, with a team of more than 50 Master Practitioners and a retreat that's custom-designed around where the two of you actually are (in Sedona or at home).
It starts with a conversation rather than a commitment. About an hour on the phone with one of our Soul Guides, free and with no obligation, where they listen to where the two of you honestly are. If a retreat is right for you they'll design one around it, and if it isn't, they will tell you that too.
Can you imagine setting down something you have been carrying since you were a child?
Can you imagine what would be left between the two of you once it's finally gone?
Emma said the word divorce out loud before they ever got here. By the end, she was telling him she believed they could find their way back.
Soul Academy
Final Call: Become a Certified Breathwork Facilitator │ September 13–18
This is the last time I'll write to you about this before we begin.
Some of you have felt a quiet pull toward this work for a while now. Not to be healed, but to help others heal.
The training is led by our Master Practitioner Gwen Payne, who has guided thousands of people through breath journeys. It begins with 6 immersive days here in Sedona, September 13–18, followed by 9 live online workshops over 5 months, with one-on-one mentoring from Gwen throughout the workshops.
Most certification programs take up to two years, and you can be fully certified in less than 5 months. We also have almost 9,000 Soul Adventures grads constantly asking us to help them find a breathwork practitioner near them, and when you're certified we tell the grads in your area about YOU.
We keep the circle to 15 people so Gwen can work with you personally. As I write this, 3 of those places are still open.
We begin Sunday, September 13. This is the last call.
If you've been waiting until you feel ready, here's the honest truth. Readiness was never going to be the thing that decided this. Three places and a start date that isn't moving will be.
Soul Travel
Return to Egypt — Sacred VIP Tour | February 15–28, 2027
Every year we're given the honor of a private visit inside the Great Pyramid. No crowds, no noise, just our own group and the King's Chamber.
One of our travelers, Meghan, wrote to me about hers. She was remembering it years later, after learning that a dear friend of ours in Egypt had passed.
“I remembered lying inside the sarcophagus, singing, and feeling the sound move through me as if my whole body were lifting. I imagined thousands of voices doing the same in ancient times, helping guide kings and queens into the heavens. It was one of the most profound spiritual moments of my life.”
That is not sightseeing, and you do not get it from thirty rushed minutes with a hundred strangers while a guide watches the clock.
Everything above is about what the body holds and what it finally lets go of. That is what Egypt does to people. It reaches something older than thinking.
This February will be my twenty-seventh trip. We take twenty-two people, because ceremony inside a chamber only works if the room is small enough to hold everyone in it.
Did You Know?
Sedona Soul Adventures was named:
- “Best of Sedona” for Retreats for 2020–2026
- “Best Marriage Retreats in the US” 2015–2026
- One of the “11 Best Couples Retreats Around the World” by Bride's Magazine
- One of Global Radiance Review’s “20 Most Trustworthy Companies”
- “Ten Best Companies of the Year for 2025” by CEO Views
Because what we do gets results.
Whether you’re struggling in your relationship, feeling lost in life, overwhelmed with anxiety, grieving a loss, or simply longing to reconnect with yourself again… we are here for you.
There is no cost or obligation to speak with one of our Soul Guides.
We will listen deeply, understand what’s happening, and custom design the perfect retreat experience for exactly where you are.
Call us at (928) 204-5988 or request a call today.
That's all for this week!
Wishing you a week filled with letting go!